Fear

Just found out that a big, no--fucking huge--monied interest may be suing a person dear to me.

We're talking many, many figures.

I don't like to overgeneralize. It's the rush to intellectuality. It's a defense mechanism. It's a way for me to avoid pain and real feeling. But I can't help it. Won't get too personal here. I'll stay theoretical, because there's a place for that too.

This is where I depart from the money minarchists, the Randians, the right libertarians, all that shit. Because they say that they just want the state to defend against invaders or determine what's fair deception (like advertisement) and what's fraud, or they want a night watchman state to go after the thieves and the thugs.

Well, that's all principle-talk for the same old practice: powerful people are going to use civil means to protect their interests. When I talk to a right libertarian, he wants the state shrunk so it serves his purposes and nothing more. If he calls himself a liberator or a radical, he's fucking wrong and I want to sock him in his goddamn mouth.

I'm fucking scared right now. All the understanding in the world won't give you any solace when a stronger person holds you to the floor and puts a knee on your throat.

Named in a fucking article. This is big. He was like a little brother, hell--like a son at times. And I can't do a goddamned thing. I can't do a goddamned thing.